Tis the Season...

to ask oneself, What will we do about school next year?

In other words, our annual will-we-or-will-we-not-homeschool-anybody-next-year debate is underway.

My 11 year old daughter is really wanting to be homeschooled, despite an abundance of friends (and the sometimes unpleasant drama that accompanies them) and activities. My 8 year old son always wants to be homeschooled.

Having one kid already through our middle school, my husband and I were already anticipating bypassing the middle school for our daughter. But, she has one more year of elementary school left, so it wasn't next year that I was planning on. Now she's given us a pretty good list of reasons why she'd rather be homeschooled and why she thinks it would be better for her. It's an impressive collection of comments and thoughts, actually. And so, here we are asking ourselves if we can do it.

For a time I liked homeschooling my kids. It was the time before I was overwhelmed with the needs of 3 babies in 3 years. Now we've had a breather of sorts for 4 years, and we're fresh out of babies here, so it stands to reason that homeschooling could just maybe be a positive thing that perhaps could somewhat resemble the ideal homeschool that lives in my imagination.

So I ask myself through most recent days, "Do I think I could do homeschooling on a day like today?" There have been a lot of tricky days lately since my husband has taken on some additional work hours. Today was nuts. (whether it was pro-school or pro-homeschool nuts, I'm not entirely sure) I had 3 kids staying home sick from school today, and I was thinking to myself how I hate the pressure of their limited number of days they can miss school, and how if I was homeschooling nobody would be missing a thing. Yeah, they might not have felt perfect, but that wouldn't stop them from listening to me read them a good book or doing their math.

If we homeschool next year it will probably just be two of the kids. (The 11 and almost 9 year olds) The younger ones still really love to go to school, all 3 of them are in speech therapy and need to continue, and I think I'm more comfortable with the idea of bringing people back home once they have the basics of reading, writing, and math down. Seems more manageable to me.

Although my recent years of homeschooling kind of went down in a blaze of...something... I guess I haven't totally given up hope. I still credit my years of homeschooling my oldest two children with our close relationship and their capable navigation of all the crud that comes their way in school and activities. I feel like having had my oldest child by my side for the first 10 years of his life was a great foundation for our relationship, for his love of learning, and for his moral development. Conversely, I am concerned about my younger children that have not had that time by my side and are now being regularly influenced by others. I know I'm not as close to the 3rd, 4th, or 5th children as I was with my first 2. (the 6th kid is getting a lot of Mom Time this year so I do feel like we're pretty close) My 4 year old son's recent introduction to various sexual information by a fellow preschooler brought this to my attention in a rather upsetting way.

Yes, we may not be able to shield them at all times. And kids learn naughty stuff even at VBS, Sunday School, and at family reunions (or homeschool activities!). I know that. So, it's not so much a knee-jerk thing about public school as it is just a wake up call that time's a-wastin', my kids are growing, and we don't get any do-overs in this life.

Would I love to spend my days with a quiet house, working on projects of my choosing, taking naps, or going out to lunch with my husband? Sure. But I'm not so sure that I'd be proud of that choice on down the line if it meant that I wasn't 100% sure it was the best choice for my kids. I know that the past year was a needed one. But if I had known it was the only semi-quiet year I would get for a long, long time....I think I would have spent it differently! Ideally I'd like one more year to get some more of my to-do list done, and to get things ordered in a way that might make me feel more ready for homeschooling again. Because, I think that ultimately we will probably go back to our original plan to homeschool, and not hop around with it year by year so much. (yes, it would still have some flex, but I think we'd like to be more in the direction of homeschool being the default rather than school being the default as it has been for 4 years now) There are just a few things that my daughter has said that make me wonder if there's more information between the lines that she's telling me, and that if I knew the rest I'd for sure want her home. Also, I can't help but wonder if I put her desire to be home off for a year, will I have missed an opening? Right now she's still young enough to like her mom...most of the time. If she turns into a snarly adolescent in the coming year, maybe she won't even want to be home any more. (not that I can't still make her do it.... I'm just wondering where her heart will be in another year)

Of course, they need a sane mother too. I'm still not sure how to reconcile all of these issues. I don't believe that there is one right answer to educational issues all the time. But, I'm always trying to be open to the voice of God, my own heart, and the needs of this family as I look at another school year.

The Ultimate Optimist

You know you're in the running for the World's Ultimate Optimist when you can go to bed saying,

"At least it wasn't on the carpet. And it didn't smell bad. And it happened before we were already asleep."

and you're talking about a child's vomit.

Yeah, well, there was more to come after we tucked ourselves into bed.

And today I've got a child going crazy with itchy legs thanks to hives. And there's no benadryl in the house. Nothing's ever simple, is it?

Notes From the Underbelly

If you like Scrubs and appreciate parent/pregnancy-related humor, you should check out Notes From The Underbelly. Lots of laughs in this new sitcom! You can watch in online here.

Thanks

Thanks to those of you that prayed for my son's surgery today. Everything went pretty well and I managed to (mostly) hold it together. I was doing really well and was in a good state of mind until about five people in a row came in to tell us scary things and then tell us not to be scared. UGH! I had done a good job of helping my little buddy understand what was going on and he was not afraid, but once people started telling him "Don't be afraid!" and "If you are feeling scared you can just squeeze my thumb..." uggh! THEN he started looking afraid and I got teary.... Fortunately he didn't see me crying. The nurse and anesthesiologist swooped him off to his room so I think things we mostly underway before he had much time to get freaked out.

When he woke up he was really upset and crying a lot which was expected (I guess it's normal) but it's hard to watch. Later he told me the air he had to breathe was stinky and he didn't like it and he was crying, and he also wanted to know why I didn't come with him. When you tell your child that parents aren't allowed to go with them for that, it seems like a weak excuse. I hadn't prepared him for having to go with the nurse alone because I wasn't even sure if that was the way they would do it, and once we got going with all the people coming to scare us with the details of everything that would be happening and could go wrong, I couldn't bear to ask about it since I knew it would make me cry just to squeak out the words.

Thankfully little ones are very resilient. Moreso than parents, I think!

I'm glad to have it behind me, but still feel like I have a whole bunch of tears held back behind a dam.

ONE Fundraising Campaign contest

Mary over at Owlhaven is running a little contest, giving away a copy of Bono's book On The Move. Go read all about it here.

Prayer Request

Just a quick pop in to say that my 4 year old son is having oral surgery tomorrow under general anesthesia. We would appreciate your prayers for safety for him and sanity for me. I've been very emotional about this and would like to be able to go along to the surgery center and put on a brave face so I don't scare my little buddy. Better yet, a peaceful spirit would be a good thing for me to have. I'm not much of a faker. :)

Thanks.

Now Running The Mothering Triathlon: DOLLYMAMA!!!!

I have been running a triathlon here. My husband is away at work so I'm flying solo with the kids. Let's see what I'm made of, shall we?

First round: Drop oldest kid off at school at 6:30 pm for band concert. Return home to pick up 5 siblings and take back to concert. Find seating for 6 in crowded gymnasium bleachers. Sit through concert and small children asking in stage whispers,"Is it over yet??" after every song. Grand finale: Make a hasty exit with the entire group when the 5 year old declares, "I have to go POTTY!"

Second round: 12:45am. Wake up and enjoy a little game of My Kid Puked In My Bed (and on the carpet, and on the bathroom floor, and on me.....). Start the laundry brigade. Strip the bedding off the bed. Clean the carpet (if possible). Clean self. Clean kid. Go back to bed and try to sleep while feeling very, very paranoid that at any moment you will be showered with vomit again.

Third round: Who cares if it's Saturday? Get up at 6:10am in order to drive your kid to the drop off point for his band trip to an amusement park. Rotate pukie laundry. Notice that three other kids are already up. You might as well make some breakfast for them and plan to stay up now that you're already out of bed.

(Hopefully this is going to be the last of the thrills and chills for today. But what are the chances of that??)

Words from the Wise...

My mom left a comment on the previous post that reminded me of something funny. Here's what she said:

Long past due in my humble opinion! You have run yourself ragged feeding the troops for years! I think the dinner call and time limit is a great idea as well. Eat it or don't, it doesn't matter but there will be NOTHING else until the next meal even if they threaten to faint or die :). You go girl!!

My mom is not one to go around foisting her opinions on her children. In fact, I would say she shows superhuman strength when it comes to not saying things that I imagine she would like to say. :) She's amazing.

I can remember one time, though, when I had just 2 little ones and my mom came to visit. I think it was probably when I was about to deliver my third child. She was observing my crazy efforts to cater to my picky children's whims for meals and snacks, and finally offered this observation (very gently):

"Honey, I think you've taken the concept of Demand Feeding too far."

hahahahahahahahahHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHahahahahahaahaha

Too true!

I've laughed and laughed about that daring comment over the years. An understatement, to be sure!

I'm happy to report that meals are going fine. I have not have to send any complainers to bed yet, so that's great. I was serving lasagna last night and some of my kids don't like pasta with sauce on it, so I decided to refresh the concept of Not Complaining in their minds before it got to be dinner time. I said to my littlest one (4 years old), "Now, you don't want to complain about what we're eating, do you? Because what will happen if you complain?"

He sweetly looked up at me with his big brown eyes and said, "If I complain I get to go on the beddy-bye train."

BINGO!

No complainers, and they all ate and even complimented me on the meal. (even the one that hates sauce the most)

I also taught them the fine art of nicely asking for a small portion if the item is not something they enjoy eating, and the difference between asking in a nice way, and asking in a way that is a form of complaint. They did very well.

My daughter, the picky one, is even showing signs of progress. The first night's meal ended up being something she likes, so there was no challenge there. Then last night she was invited to go to a church supper with a friend of hers. I told her that if she went she would have to follow our rule of trying the food that is served before eating bread and butter or whatever. I was pleased to hear that she did actually give the spaghetti a try even without her mother there to make it happen.

The meal helpers jobs are coming along well too. it's kind of a pain to have to make the effort to round up each kid as it becomes time for their job, but overall I think they are fine with doing what they do. My two kindergarteners are enjoying wiping off the table and setting it. it's great for counting (how many forks do we need?) and sorting, etc.

In my enthusiasm about my 16lb weight loss I started thinking about losing more weight, I realized what all of you probably already know: You can lose a pound a week by decreasing your daily caloric intake by 500 calories. Considering that a lot of people consume way more than 500 calories of coffee, soda, and juice, I am thinking this should be fairly easy for a lot of you. (just think! Give up that little bit of beverages, and in a year you'd be down 52 pounds!!) Unfortunately (or not), I don't drink any coffee, soda, and almost no juice, so it's not as simple for me to cut those things out, but I decided to start keeping track of my calories in order to make sure that the eating stays on track for at least a pound weight loss every week. My workouts are extra.

So, today is day three of keeping a food journal. I have been surprised to see that actually I was already doing pretty well on eating even less than my goal. Yesterday I did feel hungry (and cranky!!) through the day because I knew lasagne was coming up for dinner and I wanted to be able to enjoy it. So, I skimped on the eating earlier and had a nice enjoyable dinner and all was well and still ok in the calories dept.

I don't like having to look at calorie info for every thing, and I do find that it makes me feel paranoid about every little thing I put in my mouth. I don't love that, but think this is probably worth doing for at least a few more days or a week. If I could lose 2 pounds a week that would be really groovy, and I'd be 20 pounds lighter before our trip in June.

Blah blah blah weight loss, blah blah blah boring. Ok, enough! Have a good day!

16 pounds is a much more impressive way to say it

I was thinking that by saying, "I lost three more pounds" it kind of lacked the WOW of
"HEY WORLD! I lost 16 pounds so far this year!!!" :)

It's only about a pound a week, but I'm happy with that. If I only lose a pound a week, I'll be mighty close to my target weight by the end of the year. Either way, I'm moving in the right direction and that's a good thing.

Last night's dinner here was so crazy that I don't know if I can explain it well enough. Although my kids know how to behave properly at church dinners, restaurants, or if we have friends visiting, they are fairly monstrous when we relax in our own little society.

First there is the whining. What is this food? What's it made of? Do I like this? I don't think I like this. Can I eat something different?

Then we have one eater whom, to call her picky, would be one of the grandest understatements in the history of the world. This is a child for whom picky eating is both a fine art as well as a prison of her own making.

With 5 boys, ages 14, 8, 7, 5, and 4, there is no end to weird noises, odd body language, getting up and down from their seats, belching, farting, and potty talk.

Last night was particularly bad in most categories. My husband and I started out trying to get one bad behavior under control, only to have 2 more pop up in it's place. It was ridiculous. He finally stomped away from the table to drive the oldest kid to a school activity, and I sat at the table giving the kids a lecture about how Today Is The Last Day You Are Going To Act Like Wild Hooligans At the Table.

After dinner I did some thinking about how I helped our family make changes in other areas that were out of control. (for MANY years our bedtime situation was completely insane, but now I can get 5 kids to bed in 5-7 minutes with very few problems) I remembered that the most successful thing I've done is to obsess about getting the first thing under control first. So, that's what we're doing.

Today I am launching my REVITALIZE DINNER plan.

First, for the wild meal behavior, we now have a reminder poster on out kitchen wall that reads:

You COMPLAIN??
You get a...
ONE WAY
ticket
on the
Bedtime Train!!!

Interestingly, many years ago when our second child (the picky one) started being picky, I wanted to implement a rule that if someone came to the table and complained about the food, that they would immediately head off to bed without the meal. Knowing that it would only have to happen once or twice to convince the kids I was serious, it was a rule I was willing to stick to. but my husband thought it was too harsh.

HA!

He bitterly regrets that decision now that we have 1-5 complainers at each and every meal. So now we are going with my plan. I fully expect that my grocery bill will be lowered for awhile, and that kids are going to be VERY ready for breakfast most days, because it is going to take some serious drill sergeant behavior on my part to keep up with this. But, have no fear--I'm going to win this one.

Once we get them to stop complaining, I'll have to figure out what comes next. What would you think is the next top priority?:

eating your food
not farting at the table (trust me, it's for comedic value, not because he can't help it)
basic table manners and etiquette
staying in your seat

Let me know what you think.

I have also made a Mealtime Helper poster that gives each child a meal-related job to do. Until now I have done all the work before, during, and after the meals, and it is ridiculous. Now I have kids set up to clear and wipe the table, set the table, unload/reload the dishwasher, do the handwash items, and help put away leftovers. This morning when I showed them the chart they were all excited about the jobs they'd been given.

Last, but not least, I have informed Miss Picky Eater that her days of eating her own special meal are coming to an end. For a few weeks or a month (depending on how well I remember, and how well it's going) she is going to have to eat one bite of each thing we have eating. (Then she can eat whatever alternative meal she was going to have.) After we get used to the one bite thing, it'll go up to two bites, etc. I have to believe that she is going to get to like more and more things, or even if she doesn't, that it'll do her body good to have some different forms of nutrition.

I'm also giving her a time limit on getting the bites done (5 minutes) because I am not willing to have everyone's meal ruined with a whole bunch of drama.

And, if she doesn't want to be a good sport about it, I have a nice long list of privileges to take away, starting with talking on the phone to her friends. It's a good long list, so I am pretty sure she'll see things my way.

Diplomacy is one of my strong points. You should have heard the super-positive spin I put on this plan when I told her about it last night before she went to bed. She didn't even look miserable about it. (which only leaves me wondering if she doesn't believe that I'm going to follow through, or that she is plotting some way to try to thwart me)

Of course, my husband won't be a dinner tonite, so I'll be running this mission on my own. Should be exciting, don't you think??

Mom My Ride

This video is hilarious. Enjoy!

So now we know that when business gets busy, Dollymama readers get ignored. Sorry, folks! I can't do it all.

I've been meaning to put my two cents worth in on a movie our family watched. Like a lot of other families, we were looking forward to the DVD release of Happy Feet. I'm going to be a fuddy duddy and say that I do not consider Happy Feet to be good family-friendly entertainment. Waaaaaay too many references about sex. We will not watch it again.

Last night we watched Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" which explains the problem of global warming. I think that for a lot of people who may have been brought up without much consciousness about environmental issues (like me), this movie is an important one. It is interesting and explains how global warming happens and what the results are in our world today and what can happen to our world in the future if we don't make a change.

I was disappointed that there wasn't any practical information given on what we can do as individuals to make a difference. Fortunately, there is a web site that tells some very simple, basic things we can all do. The information can be found here.

The only thing I thought was kind of ridiculous about the film was it's political jabs. Yes, I'm sure that the current administration could have done more to help curb the problem, but a president doesn't have the luxury of focusing on one pet project all the time like Al Gore does. If he had left politics out of it I would have appreciated it. I think it dilutes his message.

I've been reading soem good books lately:

Unto The Least of These by Nathan Shaw is an excellent book about the need for Christians to care for widows and the fatherless. One of the things I most appreciated about this book was information about Bible times and history that confirmed my belief that divorced people qualify as widows and the fatherless as well. I borrowed this book from a gal at church whose husband abandoned her and their three children, mainly so that I could understand and empathize with them better. Now that I am reading it, though, I see that we are surrounded today by widows and orphans that desperately need healing and God's love (and God's love ministered to them by God's people!). I am also thinking this through from the perspective of someone considering adopting children that are fatherless. Really, our society is full of people who have these wounds, so I think it makes sense for as many compassionate people as possible to become more understanding of how to best help them. Read this book!

I am also enjoying a re-read of Anna Quindlen's Loud and Clear, which is a collection of her essays. I just love the way she makes me think a little (or a lot) harder about subjects I had already made up my mind about.

I have accepted a gig as columnist over at sahm.com in the Moms of Many category. You can go see my name in lights there if it gives you a thrill. :)

Today I went to work out for the first time in about a month. Between spring break, kids and me being sick, and just being too darn lazy to get over there, the weeks had flown by. BY know what? I lost 3 lbs. while I was away, so I guess my eating is helping anyhow. We're going to a family wedding in June so I'd like to drop off a some more weight between now and then. Must. Keep. Working. Out. and. Eating. Less!

I'm a Rock Star

This is the time of year when my husband and I start deciding what to do for each of the children for school next year. We homeschooled for about a decade, and have have some combination of kids in school for the past 4 years. So, homeschooling is always an option if we feel the individual kid needs it.

I go back and forth between feeling like I can or cannot do a good job homeschooling my kids ever again. Mainly, now that our "baby" is 4 years old, it seems that the hardest part of trying to homeschool with babies underfoot is over, so I think it could be done if we needed to. Now that life seems more manageable, I find myself thinking more and more about the benefits of homeschooling, and feeling like the time for it will come again.

The other day when I went to my daughter's class to take treats to share with her class while we celebrated her 11th birthday, her teacher said to me, "You've got to read what your daughter wrote."

She handed me a portfolio piece that my daughter had recently written. They were supposed to write a reflective piece about someone that had helped them learn. This is what she wrote:

Dear Mom,

I am writing this to tell you how much you helped me with reading and writing. The thing that helped me the most was the "Children Learning Book."* I can remember that you would sound it out then I would sound it out. or when you would give me some paper and tell me words to write and that helped me because I can write long stories that rate a 4 in the grades. Also you helped me understand things in the books we read. If you did not teach me I would be the oldest person in preschool. You have done so many things that have helped me now. Mom, you are the reason why I get straight A's in school. It is because of you and your nifty, little ideas that got me back on track.

I'll be the first to admit that at first I tried to avoid reading and writing and I wanted to stop. I used to think reading was horrible and I despised it. Thinking back it was a huge struggle for me to read and so I turn away from writing just the same as I did reading. I thought it was a waste of time and energy. But you helped me by putting the "Children Learning Book" in my face and tried to help me read and after that I devoted myself to it after I knew how. Now every day I dash down to that same book and read, read, read. Now I know that reading and writing are very important in the massive world of learning. Finally I could write with elaborations and details because you kept putting that learning book in my face.

I used to spell words horribly. I would spell words like "y z w m" and it never made a word at all. it was a mumbo jumbo mess of "words." Thinking back I thought every thing I wrote was a word, but I was wrong. My reading was also stopped by that writing jam. What influenced my change? It was your box of rice.** You opened it up and wrote "c a t" then you told me to write it and say it and I did. This helped me have a picture in my mind of what the word looked like, and I remembered it in my head and for some reason it helped me spell the word perfectly, with no mistakes. Now I can write words like that with little trouble. Or some times I can go find the words I needed in books. You have helped me become an independent person. Now I know that there are other places than the rice box to find words when I need help.

My goal is to be able to read and write very well so I can go to colege and get a job. And if I can read and write then maybe they will double my pay or give me a promotion. This all points down to you, the one that has put the book in my face, the one who got out the box of rice. You are the one that helped me get to my goal of being a successful person in life.

To sum it up I would like to thank you for all the things you have done for me and for all the hard work you have done to help me. I want you to remember that you are the reason I am what I am and you are the one who has helped me with my reading and writing. You are the one who put me up when I was far down in a never-ending hole until you filled the hole up with a million gallons of dirt that brought me back up. Thank you, Mommy; you are the best mom of the world. One time I want to thank you for every thing.

Your daughter, _____

WOW! WOW! Isn't that amazing??? I'll tell you....affirmations like this make me feel like a million bucks! And, to know that my child still remembers and appreciates so much from her few shorts years that she was homeschooled just made my day! She remembers things that I had forgotten.

I myself have risen up to call my own mother "blessed" many times, but I had no expectations of being on the receiving end of such a thing for a long, long time. What a breath of fresh air!!


*The book she is talking about is Teach Your Child To Read in 100 Easy Lessons." It is my favorite resource for teaching kids to read. It's inexpensive, simple, and quick. Much better than spending hundreds of dollars on a phonics curriculum.

**She is talking about a Tupperware container I had that had uncooked rice in it. The container was probably 8"x12" and shallow. The kids would use their finger to "write" letters or words in the rice. They would also say the letters out loud while they did this. The idea is that by moving, saying, hearing, and feeling the letters, it will stick better in their brain. Sounds like it worked for her!

Ok, Well, scratch that...

My MIL just called to say they aren't going to be able to get here. She's been getting progressively sicker since they left home yesterday afternoon. They stayed overnight at a hotel but are now heading back to their home. I'm sorry she's sick and that we will miss getting to see them, but this is does simplify my day a little bit.

Now I will do my penance by re-joining Flylady. Here I go!

In Times Like These....

I wonder why I didn't listen to the Flylady.

My in-laws are due to arrive here later today.

The kids were on spring break all last week so I'm way behind on everything.

The house is not ready.

Their room is not ready.

I have several errands I need to do this morning.

And my youngest child kept me up all night because he has been running a fever. Now I get to take a sick child around with me while I get things done!

Sounds like the start of an "exciting" day, don't you agree?

A little bit 'o culture

One of the things I love about Netflix is the wide variety of films and cultural experiences I can share with my children.

Tonite we are watching Cirque Du Soleil's Dralion performance from 2000. It's been fun to share this with them, since our opportunities to see CDS are fairly limited here in Kentucky. :)

Now I have several would-be contortionists and balancing acts going on in my family room.....

Aside from that, our chickens are probably at least three times larger than they were when we got them less than two weeks ago. It is very cold out so they are still living indoors. Our house is starting to smell rather barn-like. As soon as it gets warm they are going out. They are cute, but definitely outgrowing the live-in space we have available.

Win a Dyson Vacuum!

5 Minutes for Mom is hosting another great contest--this time for a Dyson Slim Vacuum! Check it out here.

Homeschool Inspiration: Sonlight Curriculum

Of all the homeschool curricula I've tried, Sonlight was the favorite for me and my children. If I ever go back to homeschooling, Sonlight is how I plan to do it. Today I found out about something you may enjoy if you are considering homeschooling at all:

My real-life friend Jill Evely is a Sonlight representative and she has a wonderful, inspirational, and informative online workshop that you can listen to for free. It explains how Sonlight works, why a literature-rich curriculum is a great way to learn, and more. I just got done listening to it and it was excellent. Listen here.

Ainsley's Mom is Awesome!

Today I was blessed with a surprise in the mail. A fellow blogger that I found through the Ultimate Blog Party sent me personalized note cards that she made, just because she's so sweet!

They are completely adorable, with each card done in a different fun font. I am now trying to think of all the people I should send notes to.

Go visit Ainsley's Mom and say hi! :)

Crazy....I'm crazy for.....

buying baby chickens on a whim.

:)

We've wanted to get laying hens for awhile now. (years, in fact) I love farm fresh eggs (Please see my hilarious story about Farm Fresh Eggs from my childhood..... Actually, I don't know if it's hilarious to read, but it was hilarious at the time, and still makes me laugh and laugh when I tell it....) and my daughter wants to go into business selling eggs to our neighbors and friends.

Yesterday she and I were out on some errands and came across a pickup truck in a parking lot selling baby geese, ducks, rabbits, and chicks. Just In Time For Easter!

Yeah, well, my daughter got all excited, so I decided to stop and find out just what I would need to do for the chickens. It didn't sound too tough, and they were only $1 each. So, $4 poorer and 4 chicks richer, we headed home to surprise the family.

Now we have a nice little setup in one of our bathrooms for our new pets. We went to the feed store this morning to get chicken leg bands (four different colors so we can identify them since of course we had to name our chickens!! Sally, Angel, Princess, and Tiffany!! What a riot!), proper chicken feed, little feeder and water bowls, etc.

So, hopefully we'll keep them alive and kicking so that I can continue to share stories about

-chickens getting over the fence and annoying the neighbors
-the day our chicken gets killed by a neighbor's cat or a wild raccoon
-how wonderful chickens are and how I can't wait to get 10 more
-how my daughter made a million dollars selling Farm Fresh Eggs

Stay tuned!

Come See The Prizes!

Hey!
I've been toiling away to get things up and running along for the boutique promo....I finally have the prizes up! We have some great ones, including one that's worth $110!! Come see! (and tell your friends!)

Spring Fling is finally here!

After a few technical glitches I'm finally starting the baby boutique Spring Fling today. If you are someone that is willing to let your blog, newsletter, or egroup members know about it, let me know and I'll give you a coupon code that you can extend to your readers!

Other than that, we celebrated my youngest child's birthday. I started a big, weepy, sentimental post about it, but never finished it thanks to my husband being out of town all last week, and me having to run in three dozen directions while he was gone. Needless to say, my kid is awesome and I wouldn't want to be without him! :)

I'll be having lots of interviews all week (and next week) at my baby boutique blog, with many talented women designers and creators whose products I sell at the boutique. It is so fun to keep finding more and more talented women who have high-quality, fabulously adorable products to offer! It's like a treasure hunt for me all the time.

Check Out Posh Points!

You guys already know how much I love trading sites like Paperback Swap and Swap-a-CD...well now there's a trading site for everything else!

Posh Points works like ebay, except no money is exchanged for anything. You simply sign up and get 15 points just for trying it out, then list your items that you want to trade and assign them a point value (generally 1 point=$1). You can start getting items from others with your first 15 free points, and you can start listing your items to trade so others can trade with you and help you earn more points!

I just signed up this morning and it was super easy in every way. There is a pretty decent amount of stuff there, and this thing will only grow as more people learn about it. It's free to join plus you can get something free with your points! (I just got a Bruce Almighty DVD!) :)

Doing My Best?

I'm at extremist by nature. I'll admit that right up front. I can be nice and forgiving and excusing of lots of things from others, but for myself, not so much. My tendency is to be hard on myself, to self-critique a lot. I don't know if that's good or bad. It just is.

Today I was watching something about mothers and there was a situation where a mother had chosen to not spend much time with her child. The child was therefore extremely attached to the nanny, and seemed not very attached to the mother.

The comment was made that all mothers "do the best they can."

And that got me thinking.....

Is that true?

Do we really do the best we can??

Now, before you get all defensive on me...let's think about this.

If a mother knowingly chooses to not spend hardly any time with her child by choice (not because she has to!), and the child suffers for lack of connection and time with the mother--is the mother really doing the best that she can? To me, it seems like the answer is no. No, the mother *could* do better--but chooses not to.

I have met mothers who, when finding out that my family does not watch TV, said to me, "You know, I think that is a really smart thing you are doing. And I think my family would be better off without TV too. But you know what? I'm not willing to do it. I just don't want to put my energy into it. But I should...."

Now, I don't care whether she has a TV or not. But it was interesting to me that she would said, "That would be a better choice, but I'm not willing to do that."

So, is she doing the best she can? I guess she told me that she isn't.

Now, we could get into the whole "better for who?" question. I'm not dying to spend a ton of time on this. I'm mainly turning this around to ask myself, "Am I doing the best I can? Are the choices I'm making the best ones for my family?"

Possibly the answers to these questions would vary from day to day. Some day I feel like I'm doing all I can. Other days I know I'm falling short of most ideals or goals I ever set for myself in this parenting arena. My hormones feel so whacked out that, although I have a few good days every month where I feel like I could climb parenting mountains in a single bound, the rest of the days find my mood vacillating between very stressed out, to unhappy, to nearly murderous. So, even though on sunshiny days I feel like I could do more, Could I really?? I'm not sure about that.

I had to ask myself, "Is doing my utter best 100% of the time the goal I should be striving for?" Part of me feels like God does expect that from us. Another part of me feels like that's just too much pressure for people to thrive under. How could I live if I never allowed myself down time, room to slack off, or wiggle room for mistakes?

On the other hand, How will I feel down the road when my children are grown if I look back and feel that I squandered my opportunities to be a better mother, lead them better, teach them better, help them more?

Do I want to look back and have to say to myself, "I did the best I could?" and try to make myself believe it even if it's a lie?

What exactly *is* "the best we can do"? Is it giving 110% all of the time, like you would if your child's life depended on you doing something superhuman to save their life? (Can we live like that?!) Is doing the best we do just getting along, keeping afloat, doing what we can, and not stressing about all of if?

Back in the days when I thought I was doing the best I could do, I eventually managed to burn myself so badly that I had to quit most of the nice good things I was doing just to get myself pulled back together over the course of several years. Now the pieces are back together, but I don't know what to do with myself at this point. I mean, if I'm not falling apart trying to be a perfect Christian homeschooling mother, should I get back on that track until I burn out again? Or do I stay on another path that has allowed me to regain some semblance of sanity, and trust that being sane and having some space in my life is actually a good thing, and qualifies me in the "Did the best she could" mothering category?

Does doing the best I can mean that none of us really, truly knows the perfect way to get life done? So we all just muddle along, fitting the pieces together as best we can and hope for the best?

I know some people like to believe that they have a handle on the Right Way to be parents, to educate their children, and all that jazz. Frankly, I've been there, done that, and don't buy it any more. There is not one formula that will give you the best outcome.

Which leads me back to wonder and doubt....am I doing the best I can?

Yes!

No.

I'm not sure.

I think so.

Maybe.

Yay! Yay! Yay! Plus another Kid Funny....

Guess what arrived in my mailbox a few minutes ago?! That's right! My Brave Faith CDs. And yes, it's playing on my computer speakers right now. Oh man, I love this stuff! It is So. Encouraging.

Check it out!

I also have another kid funny for you, this one from breakfast time today. We have an ant problem, you see. Last year we had an absolutely ridiculous amount of ants coming into our house, and my all-natural, half-hearted efforts to get rid of them failed.

And now, even though we're still having freezing temps some days, the ants are back, and I am very aggravated. How on earth am I going to get rid of these rotten ants??

Well, my 10 year old daughter had been thinking about this. Her solution?

"Well, I was thinking....could we maybe get an anteater for a pet?"

She was totally. serious.

Random Kid Funnies

My 8 year old son Jake the Great has a new interest in all things solar system. I have been helping him learn more about planets, etc. and we are working on putting together an astronomy lapbook that is really neat.

Yesterday he came home from school with a rock that he found on the playground.

Now, this was no ordinary rock. Nosirree! This rock was very special, and unusual, and he figured it was probably a rock from Mars, or at least a part of some meteor.

Well, never one to squish a child's enthusiasm for learning I encouraged him to do some looking online and in his solar system books to see what he could learn about his rock and rocks from space. He got right into it and periodically would come to me while admiring his rock and give me an update, such as, "I really do think this rock looks like it is from Mars. Because, on the planets web site it showed some rocks from Mars and this one looks just like it......"

He kept coming back to me to give variations on this same report every few minutes. (In between times he was showing the rock to his siblings, or washing his rock lovingly, etc. etc.)

Eventually he had about done us all in with the rock updates, mainly because he was now even interrupting me talking with other family members, or wanting attention to tell me the same basic thing while I was trying to do a hundred other things. In a moment of flabbergastation my 10 year old daughter looks up from her snack and says to her brother, totally deadpan,

"Jake, if you took that rock to a rock scientist and showed it to him, he'd be like, 'Oh, yeah, did you find this rock on your school playground?' "

She sure knows how to cut to the chase.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jake is a real sweetheart (despite having a brutally honest sister) and he is cursed the same way all the men in our family are cursed. Jake is a chick magnet.

He's only 8 years old and already the girls can't stop being after him.

Well, there is this one little girl in his class that has been in hot pursuit of Jacob for the entire school year. He has mentioned that she sometimes gives him money and refuses to take it back even though he is completely perplexed about why she gave him a quarter or whatever. Apparently today was the day he decided that enough was enough.

He told me that today she gave him money on the playground and ran away. He said,

"I stood there for a few minutes and decided what to do. I went up to her and handed her back her money. I told her, 'Linda, it is too kind of you to keep giving me your money and snacks and fruit leathers. You need to stop doing that. I'm willing to be your boyfriend if you will stop giving me stuff. And if you promise not to tell my friends.' "

Apparently Linda doesn't have a whole lot of self respect, because she went for that deal.

And Jake played his cards so smart. It's the classic Secret Girlfriend ploy. The tactic lives on!

The pain! the pain! What's a mother to do??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My almost-four-year-old "baby" Squiggy Magoo is a very affectionate little buddy. He loves to hang out with me and hug and kiss me. And now, thanks to my husband, I am truly getting my money's worth of hugs and kisses from this kiddo.

My husband started a little rivalry with Squiggy. If Squiggy climbs up on my lap to give me a kiss my husband will say, "Hey! What are you doin' kissin' my woman?! That's MY woman!"

They have this whole play fighting thing they do about whether or not I am his WOMAN or his MOMMA.

Well, my husband works 24 hour shifts, so the other day when his daddy got home Squiggy announced to my husband, "Hey! While you were gone...I was KISSIN' your WOMAN!"

What a hoot!

Enjoying the party and getting better

The Ultimate Blog party is still going on and it's not too late for you to get involved. There is a huge long list at 5 Minutes for Mom of participating bloggers, which makes it easy to start clicking around and finding out about some new blogs. I've found some that look particularly interesting to me that have been added to my blogroll. Maybe others of you will find winners also.

I'm feeling somewhat better today. Not 100%, but probably 80%.

I've been brave and did launch my new project that I mentioned a few days ago. The behind-the-scenes work is being done now, and the letting-people-know work will come a little later. (not sure how much later, but not yet) (I keep singing this song to myself as I go through the day, sometimes feeling a little woozy and nervous about the new project. I've put it off long enough--today I'm buying this CD collection as a gift to myself. I love it so much.)

I've also been working hard on my business site. I've been learning more about search engine optimization, and one of the things I had been putting off is some special HTML coding of every. single. page. on the site. That means I had to go into the back office of my site and open up every individual product page and enter coding, tweak keywords, and improve copy. It needed to be done, and because of the couple hundred products I sell I thought it would take until the end of next week. Thankfully I got it all done earlier today! It is so nice to have that finished up. Now I can get my other side done as well, and then I'll be ready to add some more products and do some more good things to make it easier for people to find my businesses. Onward and upward, I say!

A friend of ours from church was in a car accident this week. His car was totaled, but he was ok, and fortunately his infant son was not in the car at the time. As I was thinking of seeing him tomorrow and of course asking about the accident, I remembered reading the book Bless And Be Blessed. This book talks about the importance of speaking blessings to people in your life. So often we say wonderful, amazing things about how great people were when we are at their funerals, and it's a shame we don't let people know these uplifting, encouraging thoughts about them while they are with us. So, I am going to take a few minutes tonite to put together some thoughts and write a note to him and his wife to let them know some of the things I appreciate about them. I am so glad I have the opportunity to tell them and be happy they are still in our life!

Though it's been a weird week with being sick, I'm feeling good about accomplishing so many things, and feel like several goals are coming together for me, which is exciting. It's a good way to end the week. :)

Earned that Good Mother Badge, Two Weeks in a Row!

First of all, welcome to all the new visitors from the Ultimate Blog Party! Come on in and poke around the archives to get a feel for Dollymama Strikes Again. While you're at it, why not take a meander over to my business blog too.

I've been sick for most of the week, though I don't think it's strep. Seems mainly like a cold, with general aches, tiredness, sneezing, and so on. Today I'm feeling slightly improved and thought I might even get over to the fitness center for a short workout, since I haven't gotten to go work out for a week.

Yeah, well, I got a work out, but not the one I bargained for!

Last week I agreed to attend my two kindergarten son's field trip, which was a walk from the school to the library to celebrate Dr. Seuss' birthday. My little guys were SO excited that I was going to come on their field trip, and I didn't want to let them down. I decided I was well enough to go, even though it didn't sound like a ton of fun.

Once I started getting ready my almost-4-year old son asked if he could come along on the field trip. Since he doesn't have preschool today I figured he might as well go with me.

Just as I started to get ready, my firefighter husband got called to go to a house fire. Off he went in our only car, and I was left to figure out what to do.

Just skip the field trip? (But my boys would be so disappointed!)

Call somebody for a ride? (Who would I call?)

Walk to the school? (It's a little farther than my normal workout, I'm still not totally healthy, I have my preschooler to consider, and the stroller is gone with the car...)

OK, so what I finally came up with was that I could walk to the fire station (1 mile away) and get our car, and go on to the field trip.

Now I was on a real time crunch. I was trying to remember how long it normally takes me to walk a mile, and then figure in the fact that I haven't had a workout walk for a week, I'm sick, and I'll have my 43 pound son piggy back riding on me. Oh, and it's all uphill from here to the fire station.

No Prob! Anything for my kids!

So I hurried to get my wild mane of hair under control (hasn't seen a straightening iron for days), get some clean clothes on (I guess I can't really stay in my PJs for this event, can I?), get my little buddy bundled up, and off we went.

By 5 minutes into the walk was seriously wondering where my common sense had gone. There was a cold wind, my weakened state of physical illness was feeling very obvious to me, and I could not imagine how I was going to be able to walk fast enough to make it to the field trip in time, though I knew it would be ok if I just met up with the kids at the library.

Well, I'll spare you all the details except to say that we eventually made it to the car, made it to the field trip (the kindergarteners were walking out of the parking lot), went to the library (where we were bored out of our minds listening to a **20 minute long story** which is waaaay too long for 5 year olds.....and 35 year olds....), and walked back to the school. By the time it was all said and done I felt shaky and weak, so high-tailed it back here for some lunch and rest.

But at least I was a Good Mother!!! ;)

Ultimate Blog Party--starting Friday!

Hey peeps--don't miss out on the Ultimate Blog Party, March 2-9. 5 Minutes for Mom is a really neat blog that I recently discovered, and their party looks like it will be tons of fun. They have almost 100 prizes to give away too!!!

Clickety-click the graphic above for more info.

Having Fun Being Brave

Since getting my latest dose of inspiration and bravery, things are coming together for my next big project. I love it when all the question marks start turning into light bulbs in my head. :) Looks like I will be ready to rumble along with this project later this week, and that's exciting.

Other than that, I've been marveling at how *big* my "baby" is getting. He's almost four, and is such a big boy! Today he made his own jelly sandwich--something he loves to do. How can my baby be this big?! I'm enjoying that kiddo so much....

I'm not feeling well. Husband had strep a few weeks ago and I am wondering if I have joined Club Strep now. Trying to press on, but thinking of heading to the doctor.

I'm spending my down time thinking through the leftover issues needed to figure out about my project, reading Diana Gabaldon's A Breath of Snow and Ashes, and will probably watch a movie today while laying on the couch. I already folded another 7 loads of laundry last night, so this can be guilt-free lay-around time.

If I Were Brave

A few years ago I was introduced to the wonderful music of Jana Stanfield. I love her CDs Brave Faith.

Today I got a newsletter from Jana, and the message was so timely for me. Basically, it reminded me to be brave.

I've been nervously contemplating a business decision. Although it's a great idea, I've had trouble feeling confident about moving forward on it. I get nervous butterflies in my belly every time I think about it, and don't even know why. It's not that big, it's not that daring, and it needs to be done. Yet I was feeling wimpy and unsure. And then here comes Jana into my inbox, reminding me to be brave....

Check out this song by Jana. Her messages are so affirming. (lots more song samples here)

Earning My Good Mommy Badge

Today I did something I don't usually do--I went on a school field trip.

In the several years that I've had my kids in school I haven't attended very many field trips. Most years I had a nursing baby or toddler (or several toddlers) that I would have had to take along, so that never made traipsing around with 40 preschoolers at a pumpkin patch very appealing.

This time my son's class was headed to the children's museum. My initial reaction was not to go. After all, I would get an entire day at home to myself (the field trips take all day, whereas a regular day of preschool is half day), I am behind on my business work, and there is a load of housework needing to be done as well. AND my taxes aren't ready to be done yet, etc. etc. ad nauseum.

But then he came home and said so sweetly, "Would you like to come on my field trip with me, Mom?" and I knew that I had to get my priorities in order. What's the point of running my own business from home if I can't take a day off to spend it with my kiddo?

I didn't love being sandwiched into that bus seat (which does not give a normal sized adult enough space to sit facing forward without having to crunch your knees up by your face) but I enjoyed doing something with him alone, and I was glad to share the experience with him. when I had just one and two children we went to this museum several times a year....this was probably the first time my youngest ever got to go. Ah, the way stages of life change things!

I realized that almost every parent goes on these field trips, and while in the past I figured it was kind of unimportant for one. more. parent. to attend, I realize now that I am not thrilled at the idea of my kids being the only ones without a parent to show up. I don't feel bad about not going in the past--it was really beyond me. But, now it's not, so a field trip chaperone I shall be, I guess. Now if I can only get my new iPod Shuffle working (can't make it play music?! I have no idea what to do about it...) and a good book to read, it will make the rides more bearable.

Got to meet Lisa Samson today!

I had the delightful experience of meeting author Lisa Samson today at my book group meeting.

Lisa is the author of books such as Club Sandwich, Straight Up, and many more. Her novels generally fall into the Christian fiction category, although she has an edgier, more "real" message than any other women's Christian fiction books I've read. She dares to have characters who aren't neatly tied up Christian packages. Instead, they struggle, they deal with temptation and disappointment in their relationships, they don't necessarily like Christian music, they ask hard questions of God, and sometimes they even use non-church-approved language.

Lisa is a really interesting person, with a widely varied background in many respects. One of the things that I'm most interested in about her is that she and her family have moved into downtown Lexington, KY to purposely minister to the homeless, drug-addicted, and needy in that area. Being the hands and feet of Jesus is their mission. Awesome!

She brought along her extremely lovely, intelligent, and wonderful 17-year old daughter, which was a bonus experience as well. You can be on the lookout for this young lady in the next few years--she is going places.

Here are some good resources for getting to know Lisa Samson a little better:

An interview here.
Another interview here.
Another interview here!
A little bit about some of her more recent books.

Thanks to Lisa's generosity, I now have some more books of hers to read when I get a chance. Next on the book list will be:
Quaker Summer
Songbird
The Living End

Tonite's Agenda

1. Fold 7 loads of laundry while watching a movie.

2. Wait for husband to get home from meeting.

3. Wait for son to get home from Academic Team competition.

4. Keep telling the kids that pop out of bed to get back into bed.

Try not to be jealous. :)

Still Shrinking

After my 11 pound weight loss, it went back up 2 lbs., and is now back down and has stayed there. Today I decided to check my measurements and found that I have lost 2 inches on my waist and 1 inch on my hips. So, progress is being made although it doesn't show up on the scale right now.

I've manages to keep working out 3-5 times every week and I think I am almost to the six week mark, so that is good. Today I did my rebounding (mini-trampoline) workout and I plan to keep going with that since it's so good for helping saggy, baggy skin to regain it's elasticity, etc. Ideally I would do the bounce workout every day in addition to the other workouts. But, you know, life is so rarely ideal, I don't know if I can do it. I'll try, though.

Church was canceled today due to snow, so we are just hanging around enjoying another "day off." The kids have no school tomorrow because of President's Day, so more of the same for us Monday.

More Work From Home Resources

Hey peeps,

I found out about these very affordable ebooks about working from home. Since there have been some recent questions about this issue, I thought some of you might appreciate these.

Hamster Funeral

Well, one of our two resident hamsters was found dead today when my daughter got home from school. This is one of the many things about having pets that I dread. It's so sad when kids get a taste of death-comes-out-of-nowhere-and-kicks-your-butt, even if it is good training for real life.

So, I got the shovel and managed to dig a little hole (good thing the ground isn't frozen here), suggested a respectable burial shroud for our little dead pet (a long piece of floral fabric), and took the kids out into the bitter cold for the burial and quick funeral.

It reminded me of times in the past when we buried hermit crabs ("Goodbye Sparky. You were a great hermit crab..." while my 4 year old son cried quietly.....so sad and funny I had to force myself not to have an inappropriate laughing outburst) and other pets. We now have two deceased hamsters buried under the tree in our front yard. Our very own pet cemetery.

Brain Stretcher: Recommended Read

This is a very interesting post about how this man came to understand and interpret the Bible.

Snow Days and Thinking of Getting More Extreme...

Having a hard time getting to sleep tonite so am spending a little quiet time at the computer. Blog time and thoughts are fewer and farther between these days, but every now and then I have a few things to say.

My kids have had Snow Days off of school for the past two days. We enjoyed playing games and making a special treat on Valentines Day, and today I employed my 10 year old daughter to get a bunch of cleaning and organizing projects done for me that I have not gotten around to. Things like organizing closets and cupboards. She is really good at it, and the whole thing was a bargain and feels so good to have done.

The funniest part of her cleaning was when she cleaned out the bathroom closet and found two unopened 5 gallon buckets from our Y2K stash. We will now have plenty of whole wheat couscous and brown rice. :)

The other day I was watching the final DVD of the Oprah Winfrey 20th Anniversary collection. Since I haven't watched TV at home for probably 10 years, I'm way out of the loop on so many things. Of course I have known about Oprah and watched her show probably for the first 10 years she was on. I do see her magazine, know about the book club, and every now and then hear about some good deed she has done. However, this disc just grabbed ahold of me.

It showed her Christmas project that she did, delivering gifts to children in South Africa. What a powerful, beautiful thing to see the thought and care that went into that effort, and the emotion those children displayed over shoes, jeans, a doll, or a new soccer ball. My husband and I sat there almost spellbound, again hit with the enormity of need in the world, and again looking at each other and asking, "What can WE do?"

I think that people find it easy to ignore what they cannot see. We can be prejudice against people when we don't have personal relationships with anyone in that group. We can ignore suffering, sickness, hunger, and other needs when we are not face-to-face with it.

If that doesn't keep our conscious clear we tell ourselves that the needs of the world are too big to help, so us making any effort at all isn't going to make a difference.

But, you know what? That's a lie.

I believe that if everybody that *could* do something *did* do something, there would be a huge shift for the better in this world.

Yes, we may not be able to do much. No, you can't save everybody on your own. But you can do something.

Just recently my husband and I were talking about feeling an itch to do something radical. We discussed how some people feel led to go to foreign countries as missionaries. Others are equipped with the business know-how to raise lots of money and give it to worthy organizations. Some are charismatic and can effectively communicate needs and motivate people to act. Although we may have some small amount of ability in some of these areas, none are the thing that gets us riled up and ready to act.

When I watched that South Africa Christmas special I was reminded about the one big thing that we always come back to, always cry over, and always want to do something about. Kids in need. Orphans. Children that have been let down by those that should have cherished them. Kids who need to know that they matter to somebody, and that they belong to a family.

I don't know how this will play out, but I have known this for almost as long as I've been married: We want to be a part of the solution.

Our baby will turn four in a couple of weeks, so home life is gradually getting less chaotic and we are more able to reach out to others than we have been for the past.....8 or 9 years. Is now the time to see how we can actively help children in need of a home? How do we reconcile the needs of the children we already have with the potential needs of additional children that have been badly damaged in their lives already? Are we good enough parents? Will we regret getting involved? Can we handle it? Do we have what it takes? Will our children be harmed?

Again, I don't know. I don't know if we're ready. I don't know if we have what it takes. I don't know if this is the right time. I just know that the desire to do this has never subsided, and my husband feels the same way. I feel pretty sure that sometime in the future we will be adding more children to our family through adoption.

In an effort to see how our kids would feel about this prospect we asked their opinion on the idea of adopting some children into our family. Even 6 months ago my oldest child would have (and did) said that there is no way he can imagine us dealing with any more kids. But this time...every single one of them said yes and was enthusiastic about the idea, even after I explained some of the not-fun issues that we might be dealing with because of the rough start these kids have had in life. Of course, some of my kids are too young to really absorb all of the information, but the older ones seemed eager to embrace the idea and seemed to understand the ministry aspect of this. Since we talked to them about it they have asked several times what we are thinking about the adoption idea, and if we are moving forward about it in any way.

I get fired up about this issue every so often, and so far every time we have gotten fired up, once we looked at some of the details we decided that we weren't ready. There is a good chance, considering our track record, that this will happen again for this time. I have to believe, though, that all of the years of discussions and consideration will be a benefit to us, and that when it is time to act we will know it. If you care to join us in praying about whether or not now is the time and this is the project for us, please do. We don't want to make any decisions without God's direction.

Another Q&A

At least somebody likes to keep me talking. Here's her question:

Hello there Dollymama! I come seeking your wisdom yet again. How in the world do moms who want to homeschool start up home based businesses? Alas, I am not the most creative of people.

Good question!

I think that homeschooling is a huge, huge undertaking. It requires so much focus, thought, and engagement on the part of the mother (or primary teacher--usually the mother). Even if you do "relaxed" homeschooling, you have to do a lot of mind work.

Having a home-based business can be anything from a minor to a major part of your life, depending on what you're doing and what your goals are. An entrepreneurial pursuit can really take over your life, your house, and your energy. When I had just one child that was 1 or 2 years old I sold Tupperware, with the goal being to earn enough money to be helpful to my family. It was something I worked on most days, most of the day. That whole "just two parties a week" thing is nonsense. You have to work a lot more than that to get and maintain and prepare for two parties.... Now that I've had internet-based businesses for over 2 years I can tell you that it takes more money, time, thought, and energy than I expected. I enjoy it mostly, but it does tend to crowd out other things.

So, although a lot of homeschool families also do home businesses, I think it's a mighty tough combination. Of the homeschool families I know of that also have home businesses, I have heard a wide range of comments about it. The families with young children that need schooling seem to be truly struggling and wondering if it's worth it. The families that seem to be succeeding more and enjoying it more are ones with most of their children in high school or older, and they delegate a lot of their business and homeschooling tasks to older children. The few people I know of that have little ones and succeed in their business seem to be extremely, EXTREMELY organized and principled with the way they spend their time and keep different parts of their life separate.

It seems to take quite awhile to build a successful business. Nobody wants to believe that their entrepreneurial idea is going to not turn a profit for 3-5 years like the stats tell them, but it's usually true. If you need to make money NOW, starting something from scratch probably isn't the way to go for you. If you want to build up to something and have the time without financial pressure, planting some home business seeds and tending to them faithfully will probably work better.

If you start your business at a point in your life when you have things basically under control, that will probably work best. Once you've got your life running smoothly, you can figure out a way to fit in a home based business. As you add children or new responsibilities you can probably find ways to work everything into the mix. One good thing about starting a business when you need the money less is that later on as you grow your business and your home/family/homeschool responsibilities expand, you will probably have the business income to be able to afford to outsource some of your duties. For instance, you can hire assistants to do basic web maintenance, send out newsletters, set up link exchanges, find new products for you to sell, or find new places to sell your product. You can also find people to help you run your business, develop products, and so on. There are a zillion angles to this thing, so once the business is running, your options will expand.

Now that I've rained on your parade, let me tell you some good news. There is a TON of great information on the internet and SO many ways to earn money and use your talents from home. It is very encouraging to me and exciting to keep learning and finding out about other ways to reach people and expand on my ideas.

Figuring out what kind of business to have can be tough. It really helps to figure out something that you really care about and have genuine passion for. Head lice isn't exactly a glamorous subject, but I really, really cared about preventing head lice and knew others would respond to that. Sometimes things just kind of pop into our radar and we care about it so much that we turn it into a business. Others figure out services they can provide from home. I recently learned about some great new ebooks that give tons of information about some very popular home based businesses, including what skills and equipment you need to start, how to price your service or product, how to set up web sites and find customers, and lots more. You can check these out here:























There is SO much information on this subject, I have only barely touched the surface here. There are a lot of ways to start and maintain a business, lots of reasons for having one. Ask me some more questions if you have 'em!

11 Pounds Lost!

Yeah! It's been a month of killing off candida yeast, working out, and starving half the time...and I've lost 11 pounds so far. Yay for me!

I really wanted to lose 10 pounds in the first month, so am happy to have passed that goal. I kind of doubt that I'll lose another 11 in the second month, but I'm gonna try. I'd be really happy to lose 9 pounds in month two and make it an even 20. :)

I'm still working on the yeast thing, and my weekly "spit test" came out pretty good. I'm getting to eat about 1 serving of fruit per day and some whole grains (and every now and then I "cheat" and eat a non-whole grain as well), so that helps a whole lot with not getting bored to tears with my diet. I'm glad to see that I can diversify my diet a little and still make progress thanks to the supplement I'm taking.

I am also trying out Hoodia now, to see if it seems to give me any edge on burning fat faster. So far I don't see any better results than I was already having, but I think it might take a week or two to see optimal results so am giving Hoodia a one bottle chance to prove itself to me.

The kids had snow days off from school last Friday and this past Monday, and today got out of school almost 2 hours early. They are hoping for more days off this week....personally I think they are bored being home and need to go on to school. Nevertheless, I went to the video store to stock up on movies just in case we do end up "snowed in" (which is a hoot in KY compared to my upbringing in central NY).

Adding You Tube videos to blog posts

I just remembered that awhile back a reader asked me how I managed to get the you tube video to show up here. The answer is, it's easy! When you have a video on you tube that you want to feature on your blog, if you look on the page where your video shows up, you see some linking options to the right. one of those says "embed." This is the code that you need to put in your HTML editor to have the screen for the video show up on your blog. Super easy and fun!

Q&A: Decorating for a new baby

Hi there Dollymama! I have a question for you. I am having little girl in April. This is the first girl in 28 years on my husband's side...so everyone is VERY excited. I am trying to put a nursery together, but I am becoming oh so frustrated! I know that I need to go with a girly theme in some way (because I know that lots of pink is coming my way), but I'm trying to go a bit unisex as well. I don't want to have to buy everything over again if the next little one is a boy (decorating and bedding wise). Do you have any suggestions?

See now? Here's a smart reader. If you want to get me talking, ask me something. :)

My first thought about this is, are your relatives the type that are going to want to buy lots and lots of baby goods next time around? If so, I would just go all-out on the girl stuff now, and let potential future sons wait until you're crossing that bridge. :) Plus, nice quality secondhand baby stuff will sell great on ebay or whatever, so if you really want to part with the stuff to finance boy things later on, go for it!

That being said, if you do want to try to get the girl thing going on while keeping some versatility for adding a boy into the mix later, my suggestions are these:

-go for yellow walls. Yellow is a great color for walls because it doesn't jump out at you screaming "I'm a YELLOW WALL!" like some colors do (well, unless you get "sunshine" yellow like I once did--it just about matched the school bus...). To the right yellow you can add white lace, reds, pastels or brights, pink and lavender, whatever. I love yellow because there's almost no color you can't make work with it.

-On furniture such as dressers or armoires in the baby's room you can get a classic color or wood, but get fun or beautiful drawer pulls or hardware to work with your current theme. Those are easy to change in the future and not too expensive.

-If you are getting a rocking chair for the nursery you could go with leather (easy to clean spit up off of!!) or denim, and then add girlie throw pillows.

-Artwork for the walls can be moved to other rooms of the house later, so you can get totally girlie prints now, and them move them on to her big girl room later if you need to put up some "little slugger" stuff later. :) Or, you can get some great, fun children's art that is for everybody, such as what I sell here.

-Mobiles and other decorative things that hang from the ceiling add personality but are easily switched out.

-You can get a classic crib in white or wood, and then get bedding that you like. Most people get attached to the comforter stylein a set, so you can always cut corners by getting basic crib sheets that will work for anybody, and get the adorable bedding that you love to go with it.

-Basically, on big ticket stuff like furniture, go classic, and on the accessories, go specific. Put up shelving that is classic, but add girlie picture frames, stuffed animals, whatever. Later the same shelf will work just as well for a boy.

-The other thing to consider is just planning on using the room you start with for the kid that starts in it. Go all-out for your little girl, and later do a new room for a boy if you have one and have another room. :)

-In a lot of cases it seems that grandparents love to have new things to buy for new babies, so I would not worry too much about future purchases. It's a sad Grandma that has nothing to buy for their new grandbaby! :) What grandparents don't buy can usually be gotten through gift registries, or second hand if need be.

Quick Hello

Hello neglected blog readers. Here's the short version:

-I lost 9 pounds in three weeks. Yay me! Only a million more to go...

-am still working out and will not quit

-lived through the 3 week candida yeast thing. it got very unpleasant by the end, and I am now happily able to eat about one serving of fruit and one serving of whole grains per day in addition to the other stuff. Just expanding that much feels like a big relief.

-my business bonus week went well and kept me busy

-I had an epiphany last night about restructuring my life, mainly related to how I have allowed my work on my businesses to crowd out almost everything else that I like to do. I'm not really ready to start blabbing about my big new change yet. I'd like to just start living it.

-My kids are hoping for a big snow storm (4 inches of snow in KY is considered a big snow storm--hilarious) tomorrow, so we shall see if their dreams come true. It would seem kind of sad to not have any snow days for the whole winter, so I'm all for it. Especially the part where I get to sleep in a little bit.

-Sorry that the blog posts are so few and far between. I haven't had much writing inspiration for blog type stuff lately, and I don't feel like manufacturing something. I have considered writing a blog that was entirely fictional, but I don't have energy for that either. :) Sorry--reality ain't fancy 'round here.

Bonus Week is HERE!

Hey kids! Supermom's Bonus Week has arrived. Customers will receive over $100 of FREE BONUS GIFTS! How cool is that? Check it out here. Bonus Week ends Jan. 31.

3 More Down...

Hey peeps!

I lost three more pounds. (May they never be found again!)

I've been working like crazy trying to put together this huge promotion for Supermom's No-Lice Advice. I've had so many online business friends offering me freebies to give away to my customers, it has been kind of overwhelming to get the sale page and download pages ready to go. I am really excited though, because I now have over $100 worth of freebies to give to people that help me meet my goal! THAT is cool.

I've got some more work to do on it, so will probably not be able to tell you all the details until next week.

Good news! Supermom's Health and Wellness is open now too. I've had the button on the sidebar for a few weeks, and have been held back mightily by a web designer that has fallen way behind. The site is not entirely finished yet, but I decided to stop waiting for it to be perfect and just go ahead and get started with what I have to work with now. It'll be improving dramatically in the next few weeks.

My workouts are going well. I am still always tweaking it to see what will be a good fit for helping me reach my goals. Finding out about another 3 lost pounds sure put a spring in my step today. :)

The candida yeast diet lives on. I have seen dramatic results, and also saw the symptoms reappear almost immediately as soon as I did a small journey of widening my diet. Looks like it will be at least the full 3 weeks for me to not eat sugar, fruit, or grains. It ain't easy, and really doesn't feel like it's getting any easier, but I'm doing ok and will be very very thankful to finally beat the yeast beast!

One Week Report

Today marks one week since I started the candida yeast battle. I retested myself this morning and had dramatically improved results, which was very exciting! I had already noticed a great improvement in the skin issues I was working on, as well. So, it's all-around encouraging!

I've done great at my work outs, have been walking faster than ever and have even managed to run some of the time on the treadmill, which is quite a thing for me considering that my previous policy on running was to only do that in case of emergency. :) I lost 4 pounds this week, so can't complain about that! (It feels like 4 down, 400 to go....)

It is still very hard to stick with the candida diet. I did figure out several more things I could eat, but I feel hungry all the time and don't enjoy eating this way. It's much more of eating to stay alive vs. eating and enjoying it. I am looking forward to getting back to the point where I can have a morning smoothie or some whole grain bread or cereal!

I am also still struggling with the amount of time that my workout takes up. When I started working out last fall it was taking me 90 minutes to do everything, and I felt like that was too much time. So now I limit it to 60 minutes. However, I still need a shower when I come home, I'm still hungry when I finish my workout (usually finishing around lunch time), etc. By the time I shower, prepare food, eat, etc. I feel like a very large chunk of my day has been taken up. I'm falling behind on business stuff and am not sure how I am going to find a balance with this. Obviously I have to keep exercising, but I need to be able to get my work done too.

This week my main business challenge is to set up a really big sales promotion for Supermom's No-Lice Advice. If you've been putting off getting everything you need to stay lice-free every day the all-natural way, you won't want to miss this! I can't give you any details today, but I can tell you that if you love FREEBIES you will want to make sure you sign up for the Supermom's No-Lice Advice newsletter here.

Hey!

Guess what? I lost 3 pounds so far. Yay!

Hello Out There

Not that I ever had a very wide readership here, but I fear that with my infrequent and increasingly boring posts, I may drive away the few of you that still come around to check in on me. Sorry about that, but I've only got what I've got. And right now it's not much time for blogging and not always a ton of inspiration.

I'm on day three of a candida yeast kill-off. Candida yeast can become overgrown in your body, and once it does it can give you all sorts of problems. Things like skin problems, fatigue, depression, trouble losing weight, and a ton of other stuff. I've suspected for a long time that I had a candida yeast overgrowth, but all I knew to do about it was a diet so strict that I didn't think I could manage it at the time. Last year I found out about an herbal product that speeds up the process of the yeastie beasties getting killed off, without having to do as extreme a dietary restriction. I've kept it in mind for when I felt like I could take the plunge. I decided to wait til after all the temptations of the holidays were over, so now I am on day 3 of this process.

Starting this anti-candida yeast campaign coordinates with the other things I'm doing to try to get my health and weight under control. I've gotten back on the exercise bandwagon, and am even doing the very strict candida yeast diet that I thought I would not be able to do. It just happens to fit other goals that I had for myself, such as getting off of sugar, and not eating high glycemic foods. So, basically, for the time that I am going through this process I am eating veggies and meat/chicken/eggs. What I'm not eating is:
-sugar
-fruit
-grains in any form (no pasta, bread, crackers, or ANYTHING!)

As the yeast starts to die off you experience cravings for the foods that would feed the yeast (sugar and yeast, basically). So, now that's it's day three it's starting to feel rough. Add in sugar withdrawal and I'm headed for a tough couple of days.

Fortunately, I've gotten off of sugar before, and know that after a day or two of intense cravings, it becomes very easy. I can remember being so unaffected by sugar that I could go to a church pot luck and pass by the dessert table without feeling even one little pang of wish that I could eat something from it.

The hardest part about doing this is that my food options feel very limited, and also that there is absolutely nothing "fun" that I can eat! In the past when I got off sugar, I still had my fruits and breads and honey. Now I have nothing. It ain't easy!

I'm really looking forward to feeling better and resolving some health issues that I believe are caused by this yeast issue, though. It will be well worth my efforts.

Since I'm eating so little food plus exercising extra, I hope that I'll be tossing off some weight too. It was a severe bummer to see pictures of myself from Christmas and realize how really, really bad (fat!) I look. I think that in my imagination I was still thinking of myself as looking a lot better than I do. The truth hurts, folks. I've gotten weepy about it almost every day since seeing those photos.

There are some other health issues that I believe have been standing in the way of me feeling good and being able to lose weight. One is some pooped-out adrenals, the other is a messed up thyroid system. I am getting to work on both of those soon too. After that, I'm going to give Hoodia a whirl. I'm normally very skeptical about weight loss supplements, but as I've learned more about what Hoodia is and how it works, I think it's worth a try. Basically, it's from a plant, and it helps you lose weight by both acting as an appetite suppressant, plus burning up excess fat for fuel. Lord knows I've got plenty of extra fuel here to burn up! Burn baby, burn.....

Looking at weight loss from a holistic standpoint makes so much sense, I don't know why it's not done more often. I am looking forward to going through this process both for my own health benefits, as well as to learn first-hand so I can help others down the road. So many people have a very hard time losing weight, and if their body systems aren't functioning well, they are not likely to have much success. It would be so great to be able to help people be healthier all the way around!

Recent Movies

I'm behind on telling you about the movies I've watched lately. Here is a short version:

Touch The Sound is another documentary done by the same producer as did Rivers and Tides, which I loved so much. Touch The Sound is about a deaf percussionist. This film had elements I love to see: true creativity in that we see people that make music in unexpected ways, and experience music, rhythm, and sound in unexpected ways. Once again this is one of those movies that is interesting for the whole family, and really engaged the kids and got them exploring music and sound in different ways than they ever had before. Now that we have the new bass guitar, drums, and recorders, it is fun to see how the recent influence of movies like Rivers and Tides and Touch the Sound seem to be making an impact, as the children are sometimes trying out making sounds in ways that aren't "right" but are interesting and fun. I love helping to expand their (and my!) minds.

You, Me, and Dupree was supposedly going to be great, but really, truly, it wasn't. There were some laughs, but mostly it was kind of dumb and flat. If you like seeing Owen Wilson playing the same guy he always plays, like watching Matt Dillon pretend he's not Hollywood Hunk material, and just plain old like watching Kate Hudson, then go ahead. But if you're looking for something clever, truly funny, or thoughtful, look elsewhere.

Flight Plan is a thriller that my 14 year old and I watched tonite. It stars Jodie Foster as a mother of a six year old daughter who ends up missing while on an air flight. It's done in typical thriller style, making us cringe and only watch out of the corner of one eye every now and then, as the music makes us think we are about to get a sudden scare. Thankfully there really aren't any gratuitous BOOs in this movie. But it did keep us on our toes, trying to figure out where the twist would be. Each time we thought we knew what the story was, we'd realize that there had to be more to it than that.... Not my favorite thriller, but a decent one. And as a mother, it gets you right where you live.

Happy Racket and Good Vibes

I woke this morning to the sound of a happy racket. My fourteen year old son bought a bass guitar and amp with his Christmas money, so he was already up experimenting with his instrument. The younger children received recorders (thanks, Mom!) and a real drum set for Christmas. The kids were trying to have a band, so we had toot-toot-toot and thrum-thrum-thrum and rat-a-tat-tat going on.

I guess some parents would not appreciate their day starting this way, but I loved it.

I love it that we've gotten to this point where the kids can all work together on a meaningful project and make some semblance of sense to it all. (My 10 year old daughter was directing her little brothers on how they could make the recorders and drums play "Who let the dogs out" which, if you haven't heard the who-who-who-who part played by off-key squeaking recorders, you haven't quite lived yet...)

Really, I'm just enjoying my kids a lot. A few years ago when I hit a bad patch of depression and drowning I had to go into Save Myself mode to get a grip on life. I was originally a very enthusiastic mother who drank in all the fun and wonder of life as mom. As time went on and things got more difficult, I lost a lot of that joy mainly because I was too swamped to be able to.

Since I've restructured my life and felt much better and more settled inside myself, it has been a little distressing for me to notice that I still didn't feel like I enjoyed my kids as much as I knew I used to. I was still doing all the things that "good" moms should do, but I wasn't feeling as mentally present, wasn't feeling many warm fuzzies, wasn't feeling as connected as I wanted to. I've wondered if that part of my brain was just....broken, or something.

So, it's been a great encouragement to me in the last few weeks to realize that I have had a return of feeling like the mom I want to be. I've enjoyed drinking in cute little conversations, have been able to set aside work more easily in order to be the shoulder to cry on (10 year old girls can be so mean!!), the one to read a book to a little guy, the mom that spent an hour putting together a complicated wooden train formation (much to the delight of my 5 year old), letting little ones paint, goofing off, taking kids on errands and not minding it, etc. It's been so great to know that I can truly feel how precious each day and each moment with my kids is. It's been great to feel the importance of my moment-by-moment investment in my kids and know that all of this adds up to big stuff in my kid's hearts and minds.

I'll probably never be the same great mom that I was in my 20s, but now I feel like it's possible that I may eventually be able to be a better one.

Large Family Article

Today there was an article featured in MSN about large families. Some of you may enjoy it.

Hopefully With Slightly More Zest This Time

We've ushered in the new year with a bang. The hubby took me to Lowe's yesterday and we proceeded to purchase several home improvement items. New paint for the bedroom (he picked a *purple* if you can believe that! We are still trying to decide if we like it, but it definitely beats that sad, banged-up, dirty yellow we have had for years.... I think I can make it work with the right accessories.), a shelving unit for our oldest kiddo, two drawer units for our laundry room (I keep 4 of the kids' clothing in there instead of them having dressers. Up til now we have had long shelves with laundry baskets for sorting and storing their clothes, but these white metal mesh drawers are what I have wanted for a long time. It takes up less space and looks a lot nicer.), a mouse trap that is basically a baited box that the mouse goes into but gets electrocuted once inside (we already caught one--yay!), potting soil for various plant projects that were in limbo, and a few other odds and ends for things that have been waiting and waiting to get done. Thankfully,most of the stuff has already been done or is in process. I like progress.

We had a fun evening with our kids. We rented Freaky Friday and A Knight's Tale to watch (skipped one scene, but otherwise a very fun movie), had a junky kid-friendly meal that they loved (hot dogs, mac and cheese), and let them have an indoor camp out. My husband and I also stayed up until 2am with our 10 year old daughter playing Monopoly. :) So, the new year is off to a good start.

My kids still have one more day off from school. I am way behind on business work, and don't know how I'm going to get things done. My web designer is behind on my site, and I have appointments Wed. and Thurs. which will take up big chunks of my "free time." Oh well. I am trying to adopt more of a "It'll get done when it gets done" philosophy. After all, if it's my business, I guess I don't have to do anything on someone else's time frame. Still, I have my own time frames and often can't manage to meet those goals.

I fell off the exercise bandwagon some time ago, mainly because I was struggling with spending an hour and a half of my 4.5 hours of alone time each day. I have decided to limit my workout to one hour or less, but to make it happen even if it means less business gets done. Hopefully I can stick to it because this extra weight seems content to stick around unless I do something to boot it right off of my bootie.

My To-Do lists loom large and grow all day long as I think of more things I "should" do or "need to" do. I know that other people manage to run successful online businesses without it taking over their lives, so I am hoping to become one of them.