Random Kid Funnies

My 8 year old son Jake the Great has a new interest in all things solar system. I have been helping him learn more about planets, etc. and we are working on putting together an astronomy lapbook that is really neat.

Yesterday he came home from school with a rock that he found on the playground.

Now, this was no ordinary rock. Nosirree! This rock was very special, and unusual, and he figured it was probably a rock from Mars, or at least a part of some meteor.

Well, never one to squish a child's enthusiasm for learning I encouraged him to do some looking online and in his solar system books to see what he could learn about his rock and rocks from space. He got right into it and periodically would come to me while admiring his rock and give me an update, such as, "I really do think this rock looks like it is from Mars. Because, on the planets web site it showed some rocks from Mars and this one looks just like it......"

He kept coming back to me to give variations on this same report every few minutes. (In between times he was showing the rock to his siblings, or washing his rock lovingly, etc. etc.)

Eventually he had about done us all in with the rock updates, mainly because he was now even interrupting me talking with other family members, or wanting attention to tell me the same basic thing while I was trying to do a hundred other things. In a moment of flabbergastation my 10 year old daughter looks up from her snack and says to her brother, totally deadpan,

"Jake, if you took that rock to a rock scientist and showed it to him, he'd be like, 'Oh, yeah, did you find this rock on your school playground?' "

She sure knows how to cut to the chase.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jake is a real sweetheart (despite having a brutally honest sister) and he is cursed the same way all the men in our family are cursed. Jake is a chick magnet.

He's only 8 years old and already the girls can't stop being after him.

Well, there is this one little girl in his class that has been in hot pursuit of Jacob for the entire school year. He has mentioned that she sometimes gives him money and refuses to take it back even though he is completely perplexed about why she gave him a quarter or whatever. Apparently today was the day he decided that enough was enough.

He told me that today she gave him money on the playground and ran away. He said,

"I stood there for a few minutes and decided what to do. I went up to her and handed her back her money. I told her, 'Linda, it is too kind of you to keep giving me your money and snacks and fruit leathers. You need to stop doing that. I'm willing to be your boyfriend if you will stop giving me stuff. And if you promise not to tell my friends.' "

Apparently Linda doesn't have a whole lot of self respect, because she went for that deal.

And Jake played his cards so smart. It's the classic Secret Girlfriend ploy. The tactic lives on!

The pain! the pain! What's a mother to do??

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My almost-four-year-old "baby" Squiggy Magoo is a very affectionate little buddy. He loves to hang out with me and hug and kiss me. And now, thanks to my husband, I am truly getting my money's worth of hugs and kisses from this kiddo.

My husband started a little rivalry with Squiggy. If Squiggy climbs up on my lap to give me a kiss my husband will say, "Hey! What are you doin' kissin' my woman?! That's MY woman!"

They have this whole play fighting thing they do about whether or not I am his WOMAN or his MOMMA.

Well, my husband works 24 hour shifts, so the other day when his daddy got home Squiggy announced to my husband, "Hey! While you were gone...I was KISSIN' your WOMAN!"

What a hoot!