Thanks

Thanks to those of you that prayed for my son's surgery today. Everything went pretty well and I managed to (mostly) hold it together. I was doing really well and was in a good state of mind until about five people in a row came in to tell us scary things and then tell us not to be scared. UGH! I had done a good job of helping my little buddy understand what was going on and he was not afraid, but once people started telling him "Don't be afraid!" and "If you are feeling scared you can just squeeze my thumb..." uggh! THEN he started looking afraid and I got teary.... Fortunately he didn't see me crying. The nurse and anesthesiologist swooped him off to his room so I think things we mostly underway before he had much time to get freaked out.

When he woke up he was really upset and crying a lot which was expected (I guess it's normal) but it's hard to watch. Later he told me the air he had to breathe was stinky and he didn't like it and he was crying, and he also wanted to know why I didn't come with him. When you tell your child that parents aren't allowed to go with them for that, it seems like a weak excuse. I hadn't prepared him for having to go with the nurse alone because I wasn't even sure if that was the way they would do it, and once we got going with all the people coming to scare us with the details of everything that would be happening and could go wrong, I couldn't bear to ask about it since I knew it would make me cry just to squeak out the words.

Thankfully little ones are very resilient. Moreso than parents, I think!

I'm glad to have it behind me, but still feel like I have a whole bunch of tears held back behind a dam.