The post about schools which makes me ask myself: Am I Becoming a Liberal?! :)

I was visiting a blog today and my attention was drawn to 2 articles about school programs, specifically schools offering breakfast. The original article I read is here and she referred to the article that inspired her to write, which is here.

So, in case you aren't up on schools today, they now have breakfast, not just lunch. Your child can take the bus to school, go have breakfast, and then start their school day with a full belly. Both of these blog entries seemed to take offense at the idea that school systems seem to be taking over more and more parental responsibilities. Not only is the education provided for, but now we also have 2 meals a day (plus snacks in some grades), some health care, transportation, and very often they have after school programs that go until dinner time or beyond in some cases.

I can understand the idea that we want parents to actually take care of their children, and we want children to actually be spending time with their parents. We don't like the idea of children just being turned over to the state school system for everything except for baths and a place to sleep. Absolutely! But, the thing I have to consider when I look at these programs is who is taking advantage of them, and why, and what the alternative would be if the program wasn't there.

I believe that just about every school program that is out there has come to exist because of a real or perceived need within our society. These needs are not just abstract--they are specific, real, adults and children, who for whatever reason, need a helping hand.

In my own small town the incomes are rather low (the majority of the children at our elementary school qualify for reduced or free meals) and the education level of adults is also low. I think of the families that are struggling to pay their bills, the families who work 2, 3, and 4 jobs or more between the parents, in order to try to do all the things they should for their kids. I think of moms who are either at work, or are so tired and short on time that they literally cannot attend parent-teacher conferences or holiday musicals or orchestra concerts, let alone help make toothpick Indian villages or help their child learn math facts. If there is something that can be done to lighten their load, I'm in favor of that.

If kids are hungry, I want them fed.
If kids are going to be unsupervised after school if they go home, I want them safe and occupied someplace else.
If kids need extra help with their schoolwork and there is nobody at home that can provide it, I want somebody else to.
If kids need clothing, blankets, or winter boots, I want them clothed.

Know what? Jesus is of the same opinion:

^{Matthew 25:35} For I was hungry, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
³⁶ Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
³⁷ Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?
³⁸ When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? ³⁹ Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
⁴⁰ And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.
⁴¹ Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:
⁴² For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:
⁴³ I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.
⁴⁴ Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?
⁴⁵ Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.
⁴⁶ And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.

Many people would say that it is not the job of the government to provide for people in this way, although I am not aware of any place in the Bible that tells us this is so. However, would it be somehow preferable if churches were providing these services instead? Maybe. But then of course you get into all the churches that decide not to offer day care or mother's day out programs because a mother's place is in the home, and they are essentially turning their back on the needs of the struggling, poor, hungry, and fatherless of our society. If your church is offering some sort of ministry that takes care of such needs, I hope you will support it in whatever way you are able. If not, perhaps you could look at the school programs as an opportunity for outreach. My friend Sooz spend some time last year reaching out in her children's school by going in a few times a week to help some kids with math that they were struggling in. My friend Alana of Morning Coffee did the same, but to help children with reading. These are women who love the Lord and saw an opportunity to use their gifts to reach out to some children in need. Maybe they weren't able to give out tracts or do a Bible study or pray with the child, but they were able to smile and give a hug and show some genuine care and let God's love shine through them. The Matthew 5 passage doesn't say, "Feed 'em and teach 'em a hymn." It's just meet needs. Meet needs. Care for people. See the needs and reach out. Seems to me this is a good thing whether it comes directly from a church, or if it comes the long way around, via the school system/gov't.

In my own situation, when I was completely strung out a couple years ago with 3 babies born in 3 years, and my husband and I decided to put our older kids into school, we were Very Thankful to have a good resource to fall back on. We found that our local school was great to work with, and that our children got a decent education there. (far better than they would have gotten at home those years) Some of my children have (gasp!) even eaten breakfast at school (as well as lunch) and by crackie, I was thankful for that too! It was a big help to me, a tired mother of a newborn, if we woke up late some morning, to be able to have my children grab breakfast at school, because they didn't have time to eat and meet the bus on time, and I couldn't bear to wake up 3 babies in order to drive everybody to school. (some days I didn't even have a car available!) One of my children loved school breakfast, and he isn't a child who likes to have to eat right when he wakes up. He was already tired from his school schedule, so I wasn't about to wake him up extra early just so he could be up long enough to want to eat, either. It simply made sense for him to eat breakfast at school. And you know what? There's nothing wrong with that.


The school breakfasts usually include milk, juice, something hot like eggs or pancakes, some fruit, and cereal. This is a better breakfast than most kids get even in the best homes! I find it hard to see how we would laud the mom that feeds her kids a breakfast of Lucky Charms or even Bran Flakes, and then villify the mom who can let her child eat eggs and oranges and milk at school. Sorry, folks, but eating breakfast at school isn't necessarily a bad thing and doesn't mean a parent is a slacker.

The experience of having kids in school has certainly broadened my perspective, and increased my respect and compassion for others. I could barely help all my kids with homework, and I *was* there when they got off the bus! How does the woman who has to work and doesn't get home until 6pm manage to make dinner, help with homework, clean the house, spend time with her kids, give them baths, and hang out with her husband in the few hours she has before she falls asleep? I can't hardly imagine, because all of those things have been a struggle to me, and I'm sitting at home all the time!

I know a family that has 2 little boys in preschool this year. In their school district, preschool is offered 5 days a week, all day long. So, the plan for these kids is breakfast, lunch, nap, and snack at school. Well, guess what? These parents felt that this was a little excessive. So, real simply, they adjusted their involvement at preschool. They worked out a compromise with the school, and now the mom picks up the kids from school after lunch so that they can nap in their own beds and have more time at home. So, just because something is available doesn't mean everybody is going to use it. However, for the parents that would otherwise be paying day care full time, I'm sure it's a real blessing to have the children in preschool for free instead! Is that a bad thing? I guess some would say so... But I don't. If by relieving these parents of the cost of day care they can now pay their bills, buy a home, work one less job and therefore be home with their children more, well, I'm thinking that's a good thing. By the school offering preschool, we haven't eliminated the need for something for the children to do while the parents are working, but we have given a helping hand to these families.

Are there families that utilize these services and programs that are not truly in need of them? Probably. Frankly, I don't care. If we were to set up some way to decide who does and does not qualify for these programs, to come up with the paperwork, and then pay somebody to sort through all the papers and send out notices to let everybody know if they got in or not, blah blah blah ad nauseum, it would probably cost more than to just go ahead and have it be for whoever decides they want the service. There are plenty of unseen reasons that people need extra help that can't always be quantified on paper. Personally, I'm satisfied to trust people to use their own judgement about their use of services. My experience in my own community is that although it is largely poor and undereducated, that parents turn out in droves for school functions, that parents try hard to do their best for their kids, that parents love their kids and don't want to let them down, and that they want to help their kids do well in life. Past that, I don't have the energy to go around supposing the motivations of other people's actions. If they say they want junior to get breakfast at school or to stay for after school services, that's good enough for me. (Conversely, if they are the kind of parents looking for a way to pawn their kids off on others, they will find a way to do that, too. Do I want it to be on my dime? No. But, like I said, it'll cost plenty of money to keep 'em out, too.)

I think that for a lot of America, they look at these comments by homeschool mothers who are kind of shocked and horrified and saying, "Well, how can YOU call yourself a PARENT when you don't even feed your kids breakfast or be home to get them off of the bus?" and know that these people have absolutely no clue about the harsh realities of their lives.

I've said it before, I'll say it again:

Home educating familes of the world, you are blessed. Blessed far beyond your own appreciation, many times. Your children are capable enough learners that you are able to teach them without outside help. Your income, humble though it may be, probably still allows you to have one parent stay at home full time with your children. You somehow have the intelligence, health, stamina, and resources to purchase curriculum and learn how to do the teaching that your children need. Your spouse is willing to work hard so that you can stay home, and do without the comparitive financial ease that would probably exist if you had a paying career.

For many people in our society, the life of a homeschooling family is a fantasy world that they cannot imagine ever being possible for them. For whatever reasons, they do not have what it takes to be able to homeschool, and maybe they never will. When homeschool advocates look down their noses and complain about how the rest of society gets the job of parenting done, it seems to me to smack of ignorance and a lack of grace for others. Personally, I want to be humbly thankful for the blessings I have in life, and to be genuinely respectful of others, even if they can't or don't live like I do.