Lost in Translation, take two

The other day I was able to witness a hilarious and odd conversation between two of my children. Izzy Man, almost six, seems to think that a pseudo stutter in his speech is a cool thing. He was upset because Squiggy, just turned three, had hit him. Izzy wanted Squig to apologize, and Squig didn't seem to have an interest in doing so. I was cleaning the kitchen as the two of them talked. Squig was seated on a kitchen chair, his legs short enough that they stick out straight past the end of the seat. Izzy was standing next to him trying to squeeze out an apology.

Izzy: Squiggy, you...you....you....you...you....you gotta say....say...say...say sorry to...to... me.

Squiggy (silent, relaxed, watching, but not willing to speak)

Izzy: Squiggy, you..you...you...gotta say sorry to me!!!

(repeat scenario at least five times)

Izzy: Squiggy, why...why....why...why did you hit me? Why did you do it?

Squiggy (still silent, peaceful, observant)

Izzy: Squiggy, tell me! Say it! Say it to me! Why...why....why did you hit me?

Squiggy (silent)

(repeat several times)

Izzy: Squiggy, say it! Say it to me! WHY did you hit me?!

Squiggy, in a quiet, measured voice: Why did you hit me?

Izzy, totally annoyed now: NO! NO! NO! Not YOU! ME! You hit ME!

Squiggy (silent)

Izzy: Now say it. Say it. Why did you hit ME??

Squiggy: Why did you hit ME??

Izzy: NO! NO! I didn't hit YOU! YOU hit ME!

Then he takes a moment to think about this, because he can see that this "Who's on first" routine isn't quite working out for him......

Izzy: Squiggy, say, "I am sorry I hit you, Izzy."

Squiggy, still silent.

Izzy repeats this several times.

Izzy: Say it! Say you're sorry to me!

Squiggy: You're sorry to me.

Izzy: NO! NO! You are sorry to ME! You hit me! You are sorry! You need to say sorry!

Squiggy just keeps sitting there.

Izzy: Say I am sorry.

Squiggy: I am sorry.

Izzy: No! No! Say, Izzy, I am sorry that I hit you.

Squiggy, quietly: I am sorry that I hit you.

Izzy: No! Say it LOUDER. Say it right out loud to me.

Squiggy, louder this time: Izzy I am sorry that I hit you.

Izzy: Good. Now give me a hug.

(hugs, departs, satisfied)

It was the most fun I've had unloading and reloading the dishwasher in a long time.